Newcastle United 0 – 3 Aston Villa

When you’re a neutral, all you really want is a decent spectacle. Obviously Gareth Barry almost scoring a hat-trick (he hit the post in the first half) is a bit of an eyebrow raiser in itself, but please welcome Steven Taylor to the stage. With Villa one up, Darius Vassel skins Shay Given and has only Taylor to beat. Instinctively, he dives and saves the shot, clutching his stomach afterwards as if he’s been sniped from the stands. He’s off and the penalty is converted. And nothing else happened in the match. Ahem. An April Fool’s party that extended an extra day.